Had to go to the city today and I was walking down the street, minding my own business and these two women who were eating hot chips and sitting at one of the bus stops and one approaches and says ‘scuse me or something and I just think she’s looking for directions or something, (cause, bus stop).
No.

She says “We’re just asking people about their beliefs today”
Me: As in…?
Her: Well, Christianity, Anglicism (?????), you know. So you are..?
Me: Athiest
Her: Okay, have you ever thought about what will happen after you die?
Me: I’m gunna be cremated
Her:

I don’t think I answered her question correctly
Her: Well if you’ve read the bible-
(This is the part where the brain-mouth filter just fucks off for me completely)
Me: I have, and I find it very sexist towards women, especially that story with whatshisname, where he’s got like, two angels, and everyone wants them, so he goes and gives the people his concubine, and they rape her to death, and then she gets torn apart? Yeah, no. I don’t like it.
I want to add, during my rambling, this woman and her friends’ expressions slowly went from smiley and warm, to looking at me like I was a big ol’ spider. Anyway;
She goes “O-oh… I don’t?… What part is that from…?” And I just. I fuckin did finger guns and winked at her and said “Old Testament!” And walked away, and looking back on it, it was truly one of the more cringy moments in my life. I hope they were embarrassed for me, cause I sure as shit wasn’t.

After that (like, an hour later) I got approached by one of these people selling books on meditation (there were at least six around the place) and she complimented my wolf t-shirt and asked if I liked wolves and I panicked and said, “yeah, but I like Octopods more!” and after she sorta recovered from what I can only hope was the most out-of-left-field response anyone’s ever had to the question “do you like wolves?” She said she thought Octopus were a bit ‘freaky looking’ so inside I was thinking I must defend the Cephalopods honour!! so I start rambling (for the second time in one day), about how smart Octopus were, but that we couldn’t properly measure it because of how different their brains were due to the evolutionary branch-off from us being SO far back, and how I loved how squishy they were, and how their narrow pupils always make them look like they’re suspicious of everything, and then I interrupted myself by saying I had a bus to catch, and left.