Venom: I’m a bad motherfucker mmkay? I’ll eat HER head, I’ll eat HIS head, I’ll eat MY OWN head. I don’t care about anything or anyone so fuck this planet and fuck you in particular you’re sushi for the taking
Eddie: *walks in, stumbles and falls flat on his face*
Venom:
Venom: Look I’m the softest bitch you’ll ever meet all I wanna do is eat chocolate marry this human trashbag over there and have like six kids
he and a couple other neighborhood cats were caught fighting a couple nights ago and someone picked them up and took them to the shelter, it doesn’t open until 11 so i can’t go get him yet
😑 costs 15 dollars to get a pet out of the shelter even though they’ve already inconvenienced me enough by kidnapping my son
Jab loves robots 